WE TWO MAY MEET 

WE TWO MAY MEET 

MAGDELENE was beside herself when she woke that first morning home 
from Venitciawhich wasn't really surprising as she'd never been much of 
a morning person. If truth be told, she was more of a midafternoon, heading 
into cocktail hour kind of a person. 

What was surprising was that the self she was beside appeared to be 
snoring 

Mistress?" Kali's red eyes widened as two wizards walked into the 
kitchenidentical but for the fact that one had her thick chestnut hair pulled 
back into a tight bun and seemed to be wearing an outfit in which all the items 
not only complemented each other but covered her from neck to knees. The 
demon housekeeper turned to the other wizard, whose hair fell in the usual 
messy cascade and who was wearing a vest and skirt in virulently opposing 
shades of green. "Mistress, there are two of you." 

"No." The first Magdelene crossed the kitchen and pulled a mug embossed 
with the words The most powerful wizard in the world off the shelf. "There's 
still only one of me. I just seem to nave gone to pieces." 

Kali sighed, but said, as was expected, "Well, pull yourself together." 

"Not without a cup of coffee." 

'Very funny," the second Magdelene snorted. "But neither Displaced humor 
nor your unseemly addiction to that beverage is getting us any closer to solving 
our problem!" 

"We've managed to determine that she's my unfun bits," Magdelene-one 
informed the demon, sinking into a chair and reaching for a muffin. 

"I hope you're not having butter on that!" 

"Also my nagging, uptight bits." 

"Mistress, how did this happen?" 

Magdelene-one shrugged, spreading butter liberally on the muffin. "Beats 
the heck out of me. She was there when I woke up; large as life and twice as 
tidy." 

"And I can't seem to get her to care," growled Magdalene-two through 
clenched teeth. "We must find out who did this to us and why." 

"It's too hot to care." One stuck her foot out into a patch of sunlight and 
grinned down at the shadow of her bare toes on the tile floor. 

"Mistress, if there is a wizard powerful enough to do this . . ." 

"What difference does it make? I mean, really? It's been done." 

"You see? You see what I've had to put up with?" Two glared down at 
her double. "Well, fine. I don't need youI was only including you in the 
process to be thorough. I can get the answers on my own." Pivoting on one 
well-shod heel, she stomped out of the room, the door slamming behind her. 


"What a bitch," One snorted. 

"What a bitch," One snorted. 

"Then I'm well rid of her." 

The door swung open hard enough to crash against the wall. "What have 
you done to my house!" 

Magdelene-one sighed, reaching for another muffin. "What do you mean, 
your house? Try, my house." 

"The tower is missingl" 

"Is not." 

Shaking her head, Kali went out into the hall. Not only was the tower 
missing but two of the hall's four doors opened into the garden and the door that 
should have returned her to the kitchen led sequentially to the sitting room, the 
bathing room, Joah's old room, and a room the demon didn't recognize although, 
from the piles of debris, it appeared to be a storeroom of sorts. A halfgrown 
calico cat meowed indignantly down at her from a stack of crates. 

"I have no idea," she said, closing the door again. If the house vvas causing 
the cats problems, things were even more serious than they appeared. 

A fifth attempt finally took her back to the kitchen. Magdelene-one was 

licking the jam spoon while Magdelene-two made notes on Kali's recipe slate. 

"The house," she announced, "is out of control." 

"That's just so unlikely," Magdelene-one scoffed stickily. 

"Nevertheless, Mistress, it is the case." 

Sighing heavily, Magdelene-one heaved herself up out of the chair and 
sauntered over to the door, Magdelene-two following close behind, arms folded 
and lips pressed into a thin line. They walked out of the kitchen and stood in a 
square hall, warmly lit by the large skylight overhead. 

"Sitting room, bathroom, stairs to the Netherhells . . ." The doors opened 
and closed showing the rooms behind them as they were named. ". . . stairs to 
the tower." Magdelene-one rolled her eyes and headed back to the kitchen. 
"You guys make such a fuss over nothing." 

As the door closed behind her, the house shifted and the green-and-gold 
lizard who had moments before been sunning himself in the garden stared up at 
Magdelene-two in shock. 

"You're right," she told it. "The situation is completely unacceptable. 
Fortunately, a reasoned analysis finds a simple solution." Opening a door, she 
reached into the kitchen, grabbed her other self by the back of the vest and 
hauled her into the hall. The lizard disappeared, the doors returned. "Clearly, 
we must stay together in order to maintain the house." 

"Clearly," Magdelene-one mocked. "Why?" 

"Let me think . . ." 

"Oh, you're thinking. I can smell the smoke." Magdelene-two ignored her. 

"As you observed previously, there is still only one of us, we have merely 


been separated into pieces. It's therefore logical to assume that our power has 
been equally divided between us. Together, we remain the most power-ful 
wizard in the world. Separate, we are merely powerfuland not powerful 
enough to mindlessly support old magics." 

been separated into pieces. It's therefore logical to assume that our power has 
been equally divided between us. Together, we remain the most power-ful 
wizard in the world. Separate, we are merely powerfuland not powerful 
enough to mindlessly support old magics." 

"Indeed. We need answers." Clutching her other self's elbow, 
Magdelene-two threw open a door and marched them both up the steps to the 
cupola on the top of the tower. 

"Stairs; what was I thinking?" 

From the outside, the turquoise house on the headland seemed to be only 
one story tall. From the cupola, the two wizards had an uninterrupted view of 
the surrounding countryside from fifty feet in the air. 

Magdelene-one gazed down at the cove and the fishing village that hugged 
the shore. "Nothing much happening there. Wait a minute, that's Miguel working 
on his boat. Would you look at the shoulders on the man. And the assyou 
could bounce clams off that ass." Leaning forward, she whispered something as 
if in Miguel's ear. The fisherman turned and waved. Even at such a distance, 
they could see his broad smile. 

"What did you say to him?" Magdelene-two demanded suspiciously. 

One giggled. "I told him that if the kaylie weren't running I knew something 
else he could spend the morning spearing." 

"Have you no concern for your dignity? And if not," she continued, before 
her double could reply, "have you no concern for mine? We are the most 
powerful wizard in the world and we have position to maintain!" 

"Prude." 

"Slut." 

Magdelene-one stuck out her tongue, flickered once, and glared across the 
room. "You stopped me! How dare you stop me!" 

Hands on her hips, Two returned the glare. "Have you forgotten why we 
came up here?" A half turn and a sharp wave toward the large oval mirror in the 
rosewood stand. "We must discover who did this to us!" 

"Why?" 

"So that we can undo it." 

"Why?" One asked again, dropping down onto the huge pile of 
multicolored cushions that filled most of the floor space. "Personally, I think I'm 
better off without you dragging me down." 

"Me dragging you down?" the other Magdelene snorted, turning to the 
mirror. "Oh, that's a laugh." 

The mirroran expensive replacement after a wizard wannabe had broken 
her original trying to use the demon trapped inside showed nothing but a 
reflection of both Magdelenes. 

"You've broken it!" 

"I haven't done anything." 


"Oh, you never do do anything, do you?" 

"Oh, you never do do anything, do you?" 

"At least I won't end up with sand in unmentionable places," Two sneered 
to an empty room. 

"Where . . . ?" 

"The village. She is such an embarrassment, Kali." Lowering herself into a 
chair, legs crossed at the ankles, Magdelene-two quivered with apprehension. 
"I shudder just thinking of how she's perceived." 

"The villagers have always treated heryouwith respect, Mistress." 

"But she's so . . ." Manicured nails beat out a staccato beat against the 
polished wood of the table as she searched for a description that managed to be 
both accurate and polite and managed only: ". . . enthusiastically athletic." 

"From what I have heard, they respect that as well, and I have received 
the impression on a number of occasions that some are rather in awe." 
Kali set a lightly steaming cup of tea on the table by the wizard. "Did you 
discover who is responsible for this division?" 

Magdelene-two took a ladylike sip of tea and sighed. "I'm afraid not. The 
mirror is nonfunctional and showed only our reflections. Whoever divided us in 
two must have disabled it in order to cover their tracks." 

The demon nodded thoughtfully. 

What's this?" Magdelene-one blinked down at the lightly steamed 
vegetables and the poached fish on her plate. 

Kali placed a pitcher of water and a glass on the table. "Lunch, Mistress. 
High in fiber, low in fat. Your double ordered it." 

"Then why isn't my double here eating it?" 

"She remains in the workshop, delving in eldritch realms to discover the 
cause of your affliction." 

"Hey, it's nothing a little salve won't cure. Oh, our affliction. Right. Well, 
she's going to get us into trouble with that whole eldritch realms thing. It's likely 
to bring on an angry crowd of villagers with torches and pitchforks. And, hang 
on, I don't have a workshop." 

"She has added one on, Mistress." 

"And you just let her?" 

"I am her housekeeper as much as yours, Mistress. If you are unhappy 
with her decision, perhaps you should confront her yourself." 

"Yeah, probably, but I don't really feel much like doing it now. Maybe 
later." A lazy flick of a knifepoint teased apart two translucent flakes of white 
flesh. "Any chance of getting some tartar sauce with this?" 


"What are you doing?" 

"What are you doing?" 

"Didn't there used to be cat mint there?" 

"Do you want what happened last night to happen again?" Magdelene-two 
sniffed, ignoring the actual question. 

Magdelene-one settled back down in the hammock and scratched at her 
bare stomach. "Don't see how it can. We're already in two pieces." 

"And what would you say to four pieces?" 

"Five card draw, monkey's wild, it'll cost you a caravan to open." 

Magdelene-two sniffed again. "You're making absolutely no sense." 

"With four," her double sighed, "we'd have enough for poker." 

"You think you're very funny, don't you? You're just lucky you have me to 
take care of things." 

A tanned hand waved languidly in the hot afternoon air. "Whatever makes 
you happy, sister." 

"Don't call me that!" Two protested, vehemently tucking an escaped strand 
of hair back behind her ear. "I'm not your sister, I'm you!" 

"Then I really need a nap. I'm not usually this cranky." 

"Kali, what is this?" 

"Supper, Mistress." Thankful that the kitchen was one of the more anchored 
rooms, Kali put down the plate of spiced prawns in garlic butter. "Your double 
ordered it." When faced with the inevitable, she felt she might as well just say 
the lines assigned. 

Magdelene-two's lip curled. "Then why isn't my double here eating it?" 

"There was a delivery from the village this afternoon." 

"A delivery of what?" 

"I do not know. He never reached the house." 

"Why not?" 

Kali opened her mouth to answer, but a raised hand and a scarlet flush on 
the wizard's cheeks cut her off. 

"Never mind. How can she take a chance like that? He might not be a mere 
delivery boy, he could easily be our enemy attempting to take us unawares. He 
could be the wizard who divided us, arriving to check on our weakened 
condition." Magdelene-two leaped to her feet. "He could have weapons 
designed to destroy us!" 

The demon placed her hand on the wizard's shoulder and pushed her back 
down into the chair. "I believe he was searched quite thoroughly," she said. 


Magdelene-two looked up from placing her folded clothing neatly into a 
chest and clutched at her voluminous nightshirt. "What do you think you're doing 
here?" 

Magdelene-two looked up from placing her folded clothing neatly into a 
chest and clutched at her voluminous nightshirt. "What do you think you're doing 
here?" 

"Excuse me, I believe that it's my bedroom." 

"Whatever." Magdelene-one shrugged. "It's a big bed." She began to work 
at the laces on her vest. 

"I am not sharing this bed with you." 

"You're not my first choice either but . . ." The vest hit the floor, quickly 
followed by the skirt. ". . . so what. It's late. I'm sleepy. And this is my bed." 

"You can sleep in one of the spare rooms." 

"I don't want to." She kicked her crumpled clothes into a corner. "Besides, 
I have dibs. I'm clearly the original." 

"And how do you figure that?" 

"I have all the dominant character traits." 

"You're a lazy, lecherous slob!" 

"I rest my case." Triumphant, she dropped onto the bed. "And you're only 
angry because you know I'm ri . . . HEY!" 

Releasing her double's ankle, Magdelene-two stepped back and pointed 
toward the door. "Out. Now." 

Magdelene-one scrambled up off the floor. "You shouldn't have done that." 

"Really? What were you planning to d ... AWK!" Pressed up against the 
back wall, she struggled to get an arm free. 

"I plan to get some sleep if you'd just shu . . . OW! 

For every offense, an equal defense. For every spell, a counter-spell. For 
every pillow slammed into a face or across the back of a head, there was a 
pillow slammed in return. The pillows were, by far, getting the worst of it. 

The villagers stared up at the lights and noises coming from the house of 
the most powerful wizard in the world and they wondered. Some wondered 
what fell enchantments were afoot. Most wondered why they hadn't been invited 
to the party. One wondered why the ground seemed to be shaking slightly. . . . 

The impact shook the house and knocked both Magdelenes to their knees, 
hands buried in each other's hair. 

"Now what have you done," Magdelene-two demanded, eyes wild. 

"Wasn't me," her double denied hurriedly. "It must have been you." 

"Well, it wasn't. Unlike some people, I maintain perfect control at all 
times." 

"So, if I didn't do it and you're maintaining perfect control," Magdelene-one 
mocked. "Who's doing all the bang . . ." 

The second impact was more violent than the first. 


The wizards' eyes widened simultaneously and together they raced for the 
hall. 

The wizards' eyes widened simultaneously and together they raced for the 
hall. 

"DUCK!" 

After the impact the two wizards lifted their heads to peer wide-eyed at the 
object embedded in the wall. It was a large bone, almost five feet long and a 
hands' span in diameter. Crude sigils had been carved around the curve of the 
visible end. 

"That can't be good," Magdelene-one observed, standing. 

Gaining her feet a moment later, Magdelene-two crossed to the bone. "It 
appears that one of the demon princes is attempting to breach the door. This 
sigil here is the sign of Ter'Poe, and this the sign of conquest, and this . . ." She 
tapped her finger lightly against another. "This is what appears to be a 
corrupted version of my name with certain Midworld influences apparently 
creeping into the actual lines and curves." 

The other wizard gave an exaggerated yawn. "Even facing potential 
disaster you're boring." 

"Potential disaster, Mistresses?" 

They turned together to face the housekeeper. 

"You don't think an invasion by the Netherhells where we all end up 
murdered in our beds and all manner of evils like sloth and gluttony ..." 
Magdelene-two paused long enough to glare at her double. ". . . run loose in the 
world is a disaster?" 

"I merely question your use of the word 'potential,' Mistress. 

If their missile was able to reach the house, they are already through the 
door." 

On cue: the distant sound of pounding footsteps rose from below. 

Magdelene-one scratched thoughtfully. "At the risk of repeating myself, that 
can't be good." 

"You idiot!" Magdelene-two charged across to the open door and lifted 
both hands to shoulder height, palms out, fingers spread. "And while the 
darkness from the deep doth into this world try to creep, I raise my powers 
from their sleep ..." 

"What are you doing?" 

"Stopping an invasion by the Netherhells!" 

"With bad poetry?" Accepting a dressing gown from Kali, Magdelene-one 
belted it on then pointed down the stairs. "Go home." 

"Ow!" The exclamation was distant but unmistakable. The footsteps 
paused. 

And then they began again. 

"That can't be . . ." 

"Yes, we all know. That can't be good. Stop repeating yourself and start 


throwing things at them before we're horribly killed and responsible for the 

throwing things at them before we're horribly killed and responsible for the 

"I don't think . . ." 

"Fortunately for the world, I do." 

"I can think of someone's death I'd like to be responsible for," 
Magdelene-one muttered. 

"That . . . was close," Magdelene-two gasped, sagging back against the 
now closed door. 

"Too . . . close," Magdelene-one agreed from where she lay panting on the 
floor. 

"As long as your power remains divided, I very much doubt you could stop 
a second assault," Kali pointed out. "And there will be a second assault, 
Mistresses. You may count on that as a certainty." 

"She has ... a point." 

"Two. They're horns." 

"She has a point about the two of us not being able to defeat the demonkind 
a second time," Magdelene-two ground out through clenched teeth. "We have to 
do something before we're all destroyed. Before we're chopped into pieces and 
devoured. I'll return to the workshop and attempt to find the strongest spells we 
can perform with our reduced power." 

"Good on you. I'll have a nap." 

"No," Kali sighed. "You will both come with me to the tower." 

"Kali, lest you forget I ..." 

"We," amended Magdelene-one. 

". . . are mistress here." 

Kali ignored them both and started up the stairs. After a moment, they 
exchanged identical expressions of confusion, and followed. 

"The mirror is not functioning properly," Magdelene-two reminded the 
demon. 

"Yes, Mistress, it is. Ask it other than who divided you from yourself." 

After a moment spent working out demonic syntax, and another moment 
spent jockeying for position, the wizards took turns asking questions to which 
they already knew the answers. The mirror performed flawlessly. 

"Now," prodded the demon, "ask it who is responsible for this division." 

Magdelene-one shrugged, leaned past her double and asked. 

The mirror continued to show only the reflection of the two Magdelenes. 

"See? It's busted." 

"No." Kali shook her head. "It is not. Think, both of you, who is strong 
enough to do this to the most powerful wizard in the world? You did it to 
yourself," she confirmed as understanding began to dawn. "The mirror has been 
giving you the correct answer from the beginning." 


"We did this to ourselves?" 

"We did this to ourselves?" 

"How? When?" 

"When? It happened in the night as you slept. How?" Scaled shoulders rose 
and fell. "I do not know. Only you know." 

"I don't know." Magdelene-one flopped down on the pillows. "Do you 
know?" 

Magdelene-two pushed back a straying strand of chestnut hair and shook 
her head. "I'm forced to admit that I have no memory of doing any such thing." 

"But clearly, it was done. And it must be undone before the world is 
overrun with others of my kind who are less . . . nice." Kali folded her arms. 
"For reasons only you can know you have brought this division upon yourself. 
Only you are powerful enough to undo what you have done." 

"Granted, but we don't know what we've done." 

"It is in your heads, Mistresses. It must come out." 

"Eww." One's lip curled. "Look, I have an idea, let's just stay like we are." 

"I want you back as a part of me as little as you want me in you," Two 
snorted, "but we have a responsibility to everyone in the world. We must save 
them from the encroachment of the Netherhells." 

"Why? We've been saving them from that encroachment for a very long 
time. I say let someone else take the responsibility so I can have some fun." 

"You've been having fun!" Magdelene-two reminded her sharply, arms 
folded over the ruins of her nightshirt. "In fact, you've been having everyone 
who's come within twenty feet of this house and it's GOT. TO. STOP." 

"Bitch." 

"Tramp." 

"Mistresses, enough. You must pull yourselves together before disaster 
overcomes us all! There is a man," Kali continued, shooting a warning glare 
toward Magdelene-one, "a Doctor Bi-neeni, in Harmon, a town three days' 
travel inland. I have heard he attends to problems of the mind." 

"Heard from who?" 

"The baker's husband has a nephew whose friend had very good things to 
say about the man." 

"The baker's husband's nephew's friend?" One shook her head in disbelief. 
"Oh, yeah, that's a valid recommendation." 

"Do you have a better idea?" Two demanded. 

"Sure. I leave and the demon princes do what they want to you." 

"Fine. Two can play at that game." 

"It is not a game and no one is playing." Kali's crimson eyes glittered. "If 
you have no consideration for the peoples of this world, then consider this: the 
demon princes have vowed vengeance for the death of their brother. They will 
not care how many pieces you are in when they begin, but I guarantee you will 
both be in many more pieces when they finish. You may continue arguing and 
die, or go to Harmon and live." 


The only sound in the tower was the soft shunk, shunk, shunk of 
Magdelene-one stroking a silk tassel. 

The only sound in the tower was the soft shunk, shunk, shunk of 
Magdelene-one stroking a silk tassel. 

"Live," Magdelene-two agreed. 

"We have to walk?" 

Kali rolled her eyes, white showing all around the red. "You have never 
been to Harmon, Mistress. You cannot go by magic to a place you have never 
seen." 

"What about borrowing Frenin's donkey and cart?" 

"You may not be seen in the village like this. It will cause them great 
distress." 

Magdelene-two looked pointedly at her companion who was wearing 
wide-legged purple trousers, an orange vest, and yellow sandals. "I can fully 
understand why." 

"Ice queen." 

"Sleaze." 

Kali stared up at the huge wrought-iron gate overfilling the break in 
the coral wall and sighed. Deep and weary exhalations 

weren't something demons indulged in as a rule, but over the last day she'd 
become quite accomplished. Had she ever stopped to anticipate their current 
situation, she might have expected two Magdelenes would be twice as much 
trouble as one. She would have been wrong. Twice as much trouble was a 
distinct underestimate. 

What in the Netherhells have you got in that thing?" Magde-lene-one 
drawled, poking a finger at her companion's carpet bag. 

"Clean handkerchiefs, water purification potion, bug repellent, extra sandal 
straps, desiccated dragon liver, a comb, one complete change of clothes, soap, 
a talisman for stomach problems . . . What?" Two demanded, the list having 
raised not one, but both eyebrows to the hairline of her listener. 

"You do remember you're a wizard?" 

"Your point?" 

Magdelene-one held up a small belt pouch. "I have everything I need in 
here." 

"And if we're unable to use our powers?" Two demanded. 

"I still have everything I need." 

"There's not enough room in there for a pair of clean underwear." 

Rubbing at a rivulet of sweat, Magdelene-one grinned. "Good think I don't 
wear them, then. I still don't see why we can't take the carpet," she complained 


to Kali before her double could respond. 

to Kali before her double could respond. 

"Three days on the road with Ms. Nettles-in-her-britches here could be 
fatal, too." 

"No one ever died of boredom, Mistress. Or embarrassment," she added as 
the second Magdelene caught her eye. "And the sooner you begin, the sooner we 
can put all this behind us. Remember what is at stake." She all but pushed the 
wizards through 

the gate and onto the path. As they rounded the first turn, already 
squabbling, she sighed again and closed her eyes. 

Which was how she missed the black shadows slinking around the corner 
behind them. 

soon soon 
at their weakest 
away from home 
away from help 
soon soon 


Harmon was a largish town, four, maybe five times the size of the fishing 
village nestled under Magdelene's headland. It boasted a permanent market 
square, three competing inns, two town wells, a large mill, four temples, a 
dozen shrines, and one small theater that had just been torched by the local Duc 
who'd objected to having his name and likeness appear in a recent satirical 
production. 

In its particular corner of the world, Harmon was about as cosmopolitan as 
it got. 

Which could have been why no one gave the two identical wizards a 
second glancealthough it was more likely they passed unnoted because no 
one knew they were wizards and they weren't, after three days' travel, 
particularly identical. 

The shifting shadows of early evening hid the bits of darkness that entered 
the town on their heels. 

soon 

"Excuse me, we'd like a room." 

"Two rooms," Magdelene-one corrected. "A dark, narrow uncomfortable 
room for her." She nodded toward her companion. "And a big, bright, 
comfortable room for me." Smiling her best smile, she leaned toward the 
barman. "With a big, bright comfortable bed." 


Totally oblivious to the beer pouring over his hand, the barman swallowed. 
Hard. 

Totally oblivious to the beer pouring over his hand, the barman swallowed. 
Hard. 

"How?" 

"We're the most powerful wizard in the world," Magdelene-one told him 
brightly while being dragged toward the stairs. A shower of coins hit the bar. 
"I'll get the first rou . . . OW!" 

Maintaining her grip, Magdelene-two leaned in close to what should have 
been a familiar ear. Except that one never sees one's own ear from that angle, 
she reflected, momentarily nonplussed. "Don't you think we should be keeping a 
low profile?" she asked quietly, dropping her voice below the sudden noise of 
fourteen people charging toward the bar, tankards held out. "We shouldn't be 
letting the whole world know we're at half strength. That's just asking for 
trouble!" 

"You worry too much." Rolling her eyes, Magdelene-one pulled her arm 
free. "Look, you have the first bath while I hang out here. I'll be fine." She 
sighed at the narrowed eyes and thin lips. "What? You don't trust yourself?" 

"You are not the parts of myself that I trust!" 

". . . so he said, Are you waiting to see the whites of his eyes? and I said, 
Not exactly!" Magdalene's gesture made it very clear just what, exactly, she'd 
been waiting to see. As the crowd roared its approval of the story, she upended 
her tankard and finished the last three inches of beer. 

Before she could lower it, a hush fell over the room. 

By the time she set the tankard on the table, the hush had become 
anticipation. 

"Rumor has it you're a wizard." 

A quick inspection proved her tankard was definitely empty. Since no one 
seemed inclined to fill it, she sighed and turned. There were three of them. Big 
guys, bare arms; attitude. Since this particular tavern didn't cater to the "big 
guys with bare arms and attitude" crowd, they'd clearly dropped by to make 
trouble. 

"You don't look like a wizard," the leader sneered. "You don't act like a 
wizard." He leaned forward, nostrils flaring over the dangling ends of a 


mustache adorned with blue beads. "You don't smell like a wizard." 

mustache adorned with blue beads. "You don't smell like a wizard." 

"We wanted to see a wizard and we get pissed right off when we don't get 
what we want." A booted foot kicked the end of a bench; two people toppled to 
the floor. 

Magdelene knew how to deal with this sort. One way or another she'd been 
dealing with these kinds of idiots her entire life. Unfortunately, she couldn't 
remember what she usually did. And the bicolored codpiece worn by the man 
on the right wasn't helping. 

I he bath was helping. Deep, hot water to soak away the road and the 
indignities. How could she even consider becoming one again with that 
low-minded, badly dressed hussy? 

On the other hand, how could she consider allowing the Netherhells to visit 
death and destruction on the Midworld? 

Vigorously exfoliating an elbow, Magdelene wondered how she'd got 
herself into a situation with no viable alternatives. 

The sound of raised voices caught her attention. One of the voices sounded 
familiar, although the language left much to be desired and nothing at all to the 
imagination. 

"Oh, for the love of . . ." The water sluiced off skin and hair as Magdelene 
climbed from the tub, and by the time she reached her neat pile of clean clothes, 
she was completely dry. Dressing quickly as the noise level rose, she opened 
the bathing room door, stepped out into the hall, paused, and returned to hang 
the mat neatly over the side of the tub. There were some things a wizard had to 
do to retain her self-respect. 

She wasn't surprised to see herself as the center of attention in the common 
room. After pushing through the crowd, she was a bit surprised to see that the 
man who had her double by the vest was standing on chicken legs under the 
multicolored arc of a rather magnificent tail. There were two others, also 
half-man half-chicken and a couple of dozen onlookers who seemed uncertain if 
they should be amused or appalled. Whatever her other half had done, it had 
only half worked. 

In the midst of being shaken, Magdelene-one caught her double's eye and 
croaked, "Little help here?" 

Two rolled her eyes. "Were you going up the scale, or down?" she asked, 
pitching her voice under the roars of the chicken-man. "D ... d ... down." 

The three roosters, the largest marked with blue dots on the ends of its 
wattles, made a run for the door and the wizards found themselves alone in the 
center of the room. The noise building in the surrounding crowd began to sound 
like an angry sea. 

In Magdelene's experience, crowds became mobs very quickly. Familiar 
fingers interlocked, left hand to right. One voice from two mouths murmured, 


"Forget." 

"Forget." 

One rubbed at a beer stain on her trousers. "Well, all three were acting like 
pricks and pricks are another word for co . . ." 

"I get it. You have to be more careful. Just because it's on your body, 
doesn't mean I want some overmuscled idiot rearranging my face. The world 
can be a nasty, brutal place and you must be prepared for that at all times." 

"I don't think I want to live in your world," One snorted, pushing open the 
door to their room and slouching inside. 

Two glared down at the handprint on her double's right cheek. "I know I 
don't want to live in yours." Closing the door with more force than was 
necessary, she walked over to the window 

and reached out for one of the shutters. Frowning, she stared down into the 
inn yard. "The shadows are roiling." 

"Yeah, whatever that means." 

"They're excited about something." 

Magdelene-one dropped onto the nearest bed and belched. "Probably not 
about the beer." 

together 

not now 

not when together 

when apart 

"You Doctor Bineeni?" 

The elderly man slumped over the scroll jerked erect so quickly his 
glasses slid down to the end of his nose. Half turning, he glared at the 
chestnut-haired woman standing in the door to his inner sanctum. "Here 
now, you can't just barge in unannounced!" 

A second woman joined the first. "That's what I said, but she never listens 
to me." 

Magdelene-one jerked a finger toward her companion. "Thinks she's my 
better half. What a laugh, eh?" 

Pushing his glasses back into position, Doctor Bineeni stared. "Twins? But 
at your age even identical twins would be less than identical as differing 
experiences would write differing histories on the face." 

"At our age?" Two bristled. 

"You look . . ." He frowned. "But you're not young." 

One sighed. "You don't know the half of it, sweet cheeks. We're the most 
powerful wizard in the world." 

His eyes widened, strengthening his resemblance to a startled lizard. 
"You're Magdelene?" 


Waving a bundle of dried herbs onto the top of the tottering pile across the 
room, One dropped into a chair. "He's heard of us." 

Waving a bundle of dried herbs onto the top of the tottering pile across the 
room, One dropped into a chair. "He's heard of us." 

"But . . . you're a legend. You don't really exist." 

"Oh, I exist. You can touch me if you like. Ow!" Shooting a steaming look 
at Two, she muttered. "I meant he could touch my hand." 

"Sure you did." 

Wide-eyed the doctor looked from one to the other. "You are the most 
powerful wizard in the world?" 

"Yes." 

"Both of you?" 

"That's correct." 

"There should only be one of you." 

"Also correct." Two dusted off her hands, tucking them into the sleeves of 
her robe. "It appears that in the split, we both got half the power . . ." 

"And she got the really shitty bits of the personality." 

". . . and we need you to put us back together before the Netherhells make 
another try for the stairs." 

"The stairs?" Dr. Bineeni asked, looking from one to the other. 

"Yes, the flight of stairs in my house that descends into the Netherhells." 

He smiled and raised an ink-stained finger, shaking it in their general 
direction. "Almost, you had me, ladies. I can help with your delusion, but you'll 
need to make an appointment." 

"Under other circumstances, I'd be more than willing to follow protocol, 
but we need to see you now." 

"Ladies, I'm sorry . . ." 

"Not as sorry as you will be if Ter'Poe gets up those stairs," One snorted. 
"We're not leaving until you help us." 

The smile gone, Dr. Bineeni turned toward a back door. "Evan. Petre." 

Two burly young men pushed their way into the room past the piles of 
books. 

"Not bad." Magdelene-one fluffed out her hair and undid the top fastener on 
her vest. "One each." 

Two stared at her in disbelief. "Is that all you ever think about?" 

"No!" One's brows dipped in. "Well . . ." 

"Slattern!" 

"Anal-retentive!" 

Evan, or possible Petre, reached for Magdelene-two's arm. 

"Oh, go to sleep!" she snapped. 

Both men fell to the ground. 

"Horizontal. Very nice." 

"Slut!" 

"Ha! You're repeating yourself." 


Two gestured. One countered. Power sizzled against power in the center of 
the room. 

Two gestured. One countered. Power sizzled against power in the center of 
the room. 

Darkness rose out of the shadows, divided an infinite number of times, took 
form and substance. 

"Imps?" Two stared at the swarm of tiny figures scuttling toward her. 
"They dare to send imps against me?" 

"Whatever." One didn't bother standing. She waved a languid hand and 
several imps imploded. The rest kept coming. Chestnut brows drew in. "That 
can't be good." 

"Would you quit saying that!" Two shrieked as the first imps reached her. 

They climbed into mouths and ears and noses. They tangled in hair. They 
tried to fit themselves into every bleeding wound they made. And for every 
dozen Magdelene destroyed, another dozen rose from the shadows. 

Driven out of the chair, Magdelene-one staggered around the room, flailing 
power at her attackers. Stumbling over a muscular body, she began to fall and 
grabbed hold of the closest solid object: Magdelene-two's hand. As their 
fingers tightened, the wizard looked herself in the eye and smiled. 

An instant later the only sign that a battle had been fought and nearly lost 
was the tangled mess of Two's hair. 

"I can't believe they'd send imps after us," she growled, her hair 
rearranging itself back into a tight bun. 

"I can't believe the imps almost kicked ass," One added. 

A whimper turned them to face Dr. Bineeni, who was kneeling on the floor, 
staring up through the bars of his stool. 

"You're actually her!" 

Yawning, One dropped back into the chair. "Yeah, we actually are." 

"And we need your help. You saw what happens when we try ; to fight the 
darkness as two separate wizards." 

"Yes. I saw." Drawing in a long, shuddering breath, the doctor seemed to 
come to a decision as he slowly stood. "Who did this to you?" 

"Well, it's like, uh . . ." 

"Are you blushing?" Two demanded, taking a disbelieving step toward her 
double. "I wouldn't have thought you still knew how to blush!" 

"Up yours." 

"You know what your problem is? You're not willing to face reality." 
Straightening her robe, Two speared Dr. Bineeni with an irritated glare. "We 
did it to ourself. Ourselves." 

"And you want me to ... ?" 

"Put us back together." 

Bushy gray brows rose above the rims of the glasses. "You want to be back 


together?" 

together?" 

"Not to mention a responsibility to not be personally sliced and diced." 

"I see. You held hands to defeat the smaller darkness," he added 
thoughtfully. 

"We can't keep doing that." 

"Why not?" 

"We can't stand each other." 

"Again, why not?" He spread his hands. "Are you not both you? Do you 
dislike yourself so?" 

"I like myself just fine," One broke in before Two could answer. "It's her I 
can't stand. Bossy, uptight, neat freak!" 

"Lazy, lasciviousyou don't care about anything but your


self!" 

"Lady Wizards, please." Stepping over a sleeping bodyguard to stand 
between them, the doctor looked from one to the other and sighed. "What 
happened to make you dislike yourself so?" 

Dr. Bineeni's consultation room was as full of books and scrolls and 
candles and jars as his inner sanctum, but it also held a wide chaise lounge. 
Magdelene-two created a second and the wizards wearing identical 
apprehensive expressionslay down. 

"All right." Settling himself in the room's only chair, the doctor picked up a 
slate and a piece of chalk. "Let's start with some stream of consciousness. I'll 
begin a phrase and you will finish it with the first thing that comes into your 
head. You," a finger pointed toward Magdelene-one, "will respond first and 
then you will alternate responses. Are you ready?" 

"Sure. I guess." 

"With great power comes great . . . ?" 

"Booty!" 

Her chaise lounge collapsed. 

"Hey! It was the first word that came into my head!" 

"No surprise!" 

"Lady Wizards! Please. Let's try something else. What is the last thing you 
remember before this happened." 

"I went to bed." 

"Alone?" 

"Yes. I'd just got back from Venitcia and I was tired." 

"Venitcia?" 

"A city." Two frowned, trying to remember. 


"And you were there because?" 

"And you were there because?" 

The doctor turned to One, who shrugged. "You got me, Doc." 

"This is important." Dr. Bineeni pushed his glasses up his 

nose. "I will begin the thought, I want you to finish it. I went to Venitcia 
because . . . ?" 

"Someone asked for my help." 

"Our help." 

Right hand gripping the rail with white-knuckled fingers, Magdelene 
straightened and wiped her mouth on the back of her left. "Did I happen to 
mention how much I hate boats?" 

"You did." Trying not to smile, Antonio handed her a water-skin. "And then 
you called a wind to speed our passage, and then, if I'm not mistaken, you 
mentioned it again." He waited until she drank, then reached out and gently 
caressed her cheek. "Did I happen to mention how grateful I am that you would 
not allow this hatred to keep you from helping my people?" 

"You did." Leaning into his touch, Magdelene all but purred. Not even the 
constant churning of her stomach could dull her appreciation of a beautiful, 
dark-eyed man. She liked to think that she'd have agreed to help regardless of 
who the Venitcia town council had sent to petition her, but she was just as glad 
that they'd hedged their bets by playing to her known weakness. 

Until he'd climbed the path to the turquoise house on the hill, Antonio had 
thought he'd been sent on a fool's errandthat the most powerful wizard in the 
world was a legend, a story told by wandering bards. Told enthusiastically by 
bards who'd wandered in the right direction. Magdelene had always been 
partial to men who made music. 

And to those who actually made an effort to seek her out. 

"My village was built many, many years ago on the slopes of an ancient 
volcano, a volcano that has recently begun to stir. My people cannot leave a 
place that has been home to them for generations." 

"Cannot?" 

"Will not," Antonio had admitted, smiling, and Magdelene was lost. 

"We're close," he told her, tucking her safely in the curve of 

his arm as the boat rolled. "That is the smoke of the volcano. When we 
round this headland, we'll see Venitcia. . . . 

When they rounded the headland, they saw steam rising off the water in a 
billowing cloud as a single lava stream continued to make its way to the sea. 
There was no town. No terraced orchards. No temples. No wharves. No 
livestock. No people. 

The captain took his vessel as close as he dared, then Magde-lene and 
Antonio took the small boat to shore. It took them a while to find a safe place to 


land and then a while longer to walk back to the town. Antonio said nothing the 
entire time. 

land and then a while longer to walk back to the town. Antonio said nothing the 
entire time. 

"How . . . ?" 
"The lava told me." It had been bragging actually. She left that part out. 
Antonio walked to the edge of the crust and stared down into the last river 


of molten rock. "Is everyone dead?" 

"Yes." 

He sighed, brushed a fall of dark hair back off his face, and half turned; just 
far enough to smile sadly at her. "It wasn't your fault," he said. 
Before Magdelene could stop him, he fell gracefully forward and joined 
his people in death. 
Until that moment, she hadn't even considered that it might be her fault. 

"I didn't take it seriously enough." 
"I should have hurried." 
"You called a wind to fill the sails of the boat," Dr. Bineeni reminded them 


gently. 
"That was for my comfort," Two said bitterly. "Not for Venitcia." 
Sitting with her back against the wall, legs tucked up against her chest, One 

wiped her cheeks on her knees. "I was too late." 
The doctor shook his head. "It wasn't your fault. Antonio was right." 
"Antonio is dead." 
"Yes. But he made his choice. You have to let that go." Looking from one to 

the other, he spread his hands. "You can't raise the dead." 
"Actually, I can." 
Dr. Bineeni blinked. Then he remembered to breathe. "You can?" 
"If the flesh is still in a condition for the spirit to wear it," Two amended. 
"Although I sort of promised Death I'd stop," One sighted. "It screws up her 

accounting." 
"So, given the manner of his death, you couldn't bring Antonio back." 
"No." 
"Nor any of his people." 
"No." 
"But if I'd known," Two insisted, "I could have stopped it." 
"So many things I could stop if I knew," One agreed. 
"But I don't know. Because all I do is lie in the sun and have a good time." 
The doctor's brows rose. "All you do?" 
"All I did." Two's lips were pressed into a thin disapproving line as she 


nodded toward her double. "All she does. I recognize my responsibilities." 

nodded toward her double. "All she does. I recognize my responsibilities." 

One scooted forward to the edge of the lounge, "then you can fix us?" 

"No. Then you can fix yourself." 

"If I'm going to fix myself," One muttered, "why'd I have to come see you." 

Dr. Bineeni ignored her. "You have to learn to like yourself again." 

"Myself, yes. Her . . ." 

". . . no," Two finished, lip curled. 

"We'll see." He sat back, glanced from one to the other, and said quietly, 
"You have, in your house, a flight of stairs that descends to the Netherhells. 
Why?" 

One snorted. "It's convenient." 

"Convenient? To have demons emerge out of your basement?" 

"Well, it's more of a subbasement, but yeah." 

"Why?" 

"So that I know where they are," Two interjected before One could answer. 
"The demon princes gain power by slaughter. You don't want them running 
around the world unopposed." 

"No, I don't." As the silence lengthened, he added, "Legends say there were 
once six demon princes, but the most powerful wizard in the world stood 
between the mighty Kan'Kon and the slaughter he craved, and now there are 
five. Mourn for Antonio, mourn for his people, but do not define the rest of your 
life by his loss." 

Although she had the boiling oil ready at the top of the stairs, Kali stepped 
gratefully aside as a single pop of displaced air heralded the return of her 
mistress. The clothing suggested that only Magdelene-one had returned, but then 
she noted the purposeful stride and the light of battle in the wizard's eyes and 
the demon-housekeeper gave a heavy sigh of relief. 

Even given that the light of battle was more accurately a light of extreme 
annoyance. 

"Mistress, they are very close." 

"I can see that," Magdelene noted as the bone spearhead came through the 
door. Grasping the handle, she flung it open and smiled at the demon attempting 
to free his weapon. "Hi. I'm back." 

It froze. Those members of the demonic horde pushing up the stairs behind 
it who were within the sound of her voice, froze as well. 

From deep within the bowels of the Earth, a fell voice snarled, "What's 
the holdup!" 

"She's back." 

Silence. One moment. Two. Then: "Oh, crap." 


The demon at the top of the stairs curled a lipless mouth into what might 
have been a conciliatory smile. 

The demon at the top of the stairs curled a lipless mouth into what might 
have been a conciliatory smile. 

A moment later, the stairs were clear, although the bouncing continued for 
some time. Magdelene waited until the moaning and the swearing and the 
recriminations died down, then she leaned out over the threshold. "Don't 
make me come down there." 

The lower door slammed emphatically shut, the vibration rocking her back 
on her heels. 

"Temper, temper," she muttered, stepping back into the hall. 

"I am pleased you are yourself again, Mistress." Lifting the vat of oil, Kali 
carried it into the kitchen. "I am happy the doctor was able to heal you." 

"He got me moving forward again," Magdelene allowed, following her 
housekeeper. "Although I am the most powerful wizard in the world and I 
probably could have figured it out eventually on my own." 

"We had time for neither probably or eventually, Mistress." 

"True. I guess I needed someone to get into my head." 

Kali stared at the wizard for a long moment, then surrendered to temptation. 
"That's a change," she said. 


